A Smile Can Change The World (by Tara)

The following is written by our wonderful, beloved volunteer, Tara.  Hope you enjoy it as much as I did!  - Kim

AWESOME VOLUNTEERS WANTED!

When I replied to an inconspicuous kijiji ad last summer, I never realized the impact it might have on my life. I had just graduated from Laurier where I was heavily involved in volunteering. After moving back home, I felt a void in my life and knew I wanted to get back into a long-term and fullfilling involvement, but had no idea what that might be.

In training... "we all fall down!"

"I knew I had stumbled upon something incredible" 

From my first contact with Kim (Remy's mom), I could FEEL the love that was in their household, and I knew I had stumbled upon something incredible. My initial hesitation about not being an autism expert or formally trained in treatment of special individuals vanished the more I corresponded with Kim, and after meeting Remy for the first time, I was thoroughly excited to start to get to know this litte (*ahem* I mean, BIG) guy.



Remy loves hugs... and looking at himself in the mirror.

Kim is such a welcoming, loving, and warm volunteer coordinator and has made my time with Remy fabulous. She opened her home to me and trained me passionately and enthusiastically! I felt listened to, and valued. Although I knew very little about Autism, I felt fully prepared to enter the playroom with Remy....
What a special place!! walking into the playroom is like walking into another world where anything you may have previously known is thrown away, and a whole new attitude and approach is adopted. One of love, and fun and seeing possibilities instead of disabilities. One of no-inhibitions and anything-goes.

Questions and Uncertainty

My first few sessions with Remy were full of questions and uncertainty, this was all foreign territory to me, uncharted waters. Although there were so many unknowns- what was Remy doing? what is he trying to say? is what we are doing OK? what are we going to do next? how will I fill 2 whole hours!?!? what if I don't do a good job?- it felt good, and I knew it could only get better. I started with only a few minutes at a time in the playroom (just about all I could handle as it was initially very physically and mentally draining), and gradually built my way up to a full session length of 2 hours. Kim not only offered constructive critisim, but also praised me and sought out my feelings on the session, I was an important part of Remy's team, his family, just as all volunteers are!


Rip... rip...rip...

Attitude

The longer I volunteered with Remy, the more I realized, its not WHAT we do for our time together, but the ATTITUDE with which we enjoy each others company. The longer I stayed with the Son-Rise Program®, the more I let my guarrds down (dropping all the inhibitions I had built up over 22 years!) and learned to let myself enjoy the session in whatever way Remy may want to lead us in. Sometimes we have crazy sessions filled with running, spinning, and jumping, one activity to the next, other times we happily sit in silence for most of the session, just loving each others presence.



Reach!

Working with Remy and his family has been an INCREDIBLE thing in my life, in so many ways. I see progress in Remy in many areas, and knowing I have had the privelge of being involved in that warms my heart. The converse is also true, Remy has helped me grow in so many ways and learn so much about myself. Finally, I have become part of his family and truley cherish the relationship I have with the Laurins.



I love you!

Remy is Special

Remy is the SMARTEST little guy I know, so ingenious in getting what he wants, so liberated in doing exactly what he wants and what makes him happiest. He smiles and laughes and stares are so genuine and pure of heart. He has only the best intentions and no matter what he does in life, he will be amazing at it! Remy never ceases to bring a smile to my face, from his little quirks to his full delightful laugh that I so LOVE to hear! He has been the reason I get out bed on a bad day, and walk around with thoroughly MESSED UP HAIR, beacuse when I am with Remy, nothing else matters, and when I am not with him, the lessons I have learned remain.



Hanging out outside the Play Room

Life-Changing Program

I can not speak highly enough of getting invovled in this life-changing program. Take the first step and get involved, you will not regret it. One things leads to another. Before volunteering with Remy I struggled with depression. Since meeting his family and being involved in their Son-Rise Program, I was also introduced to The Option Institute where I was fortunate to attend a 2 week long retreat where I built upon some of the foundations I learned in the Son-Rise Program. That in itself was a life changing event, and since then I have been so happy and joyful, and so many positive changes have occured in my life. Like I started with, who knew all the wonderful things that were to come when I replied to that ad almost a year ago

Looking through the two way mirror.

with much everlasting love,

Tara

Thank you, Tara, for your love, dedication, inspiration and 3Es!

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Update on Progress

It's been over four months now since I've been back home with my beautiful growing family.  New Frontiers Program as part of the Son-Rise Squence was an amazing experience... but it's an experience that has continued, and I believe, will continue further.

Since my last post was already several months ago, here's a quick update to what's been going on.

Volunteers:

We still have three wonderful volunteers who come in twice every week to play with Remy in his Room.  We are delighted that one of our volunteers will be attending Option adult courses to help her grow as a person.  I am very excited for her personal journey as well as what she might bring back to share with us.

Alex has also been playing in the Room with Remy regularly after returning from Option in December from the Start-Up Program.  His involvement and now deeper understanding of the Son-Rise attitude and life-style has been very helpful.  Alex noticed that Remy was much more attentive to him when he returned, probably much to do with the new found attitude.

We are still looking for AWESOME people to volunteer in our program!  So, if you know of someone who would love to learn more about this opportunity, please forward our website and contact information!  Thank you.

Intensive:

l think I told everyone that while Alex was at Option that he took a huge leap of faith and put a deposit down for Remy's team (that Alex, me, baby and two other people) to attend the Intensive Program at the Autism Treatment Center of America in December 2012.  Well, for financial reasons we felt it was wise to ask for a refund and cancel the Intensive for now.  I'm not disappointed.  In fact, I am really proud of Alex for taking that step to show his commitment and his faith in Remy's Son-Rise Program.  Somehow with will, I believe we will be able to fund raise to cover the $18,400 USD program plus travel.

Right now, it is the present that matters.  Someone I have to remind myself to be kind to ourselves in order to propel ourselves forward.

Remy's Progress:

This past weekend was Family Day weekend in Ontario, so we got the Monday off.  On the Saturday, Remy's Auntie and my friend Dana took Remy and Little Sister to go swimming at a small private condo.  I couldn't remember the last time Remy showed SO much excitement, thrill and expression of his happiness and freedom.  At first he was a little hesitant about going in to the pool, but with help from Auntie and Dana, he entered the water... then he got out, ran about the deck (although we helplessly called for him to stop running on the wet deck!), got back in, splashed everyone, vocalized his thrill non stop... WOW!  what a blast he had.  It was so exciting for us to watch the FUN exploding out of this little boy.

The next day, Sunday, Auntie and one of our volunteers Tara took both kids tobogganing!   Yet another thrilling activity for Remy.  He was all giggles, massive sweet smiles.  He was bursting with energy as he ran up the hill time and time again while the others got tired.

During the year before Remy's ASD diagnosis, Alex would try to take Remy out tobogganing or swimming or some other activity he thought Remy would enjoy... I remember asking Alex after the first time he took Remy tobogganing, "did Remy have fun?" Alex's responded that he wasn't sure.  Remy seemed to have the same expression, the same looking at space no matter what he did.  Today, I can confidently testify that Remy is indeed more connected with us and much more in our world than two or three years ago.

Permanent change is gradual, no?  We have definitely made progress!  It takes time to see the changes.  After swimming on the Saturday, we visited Dana's parents in their new condo briefly, and Dana's dad told me that Remy was different; he seemed a lot more sociable.  Dana's dad hadn't seen Remy in over a year, and he said that before Remy would not go near him or look at him much less say "hi" or "bye".  During this short visit, Remy got close enough to almost drink his Coke and rum!  And when leaving Remy waved and said "bye bye"!  Little by little, our little boy is connecting more and more with us.

I am grateful for this opportunity to share with you these wonderful blessings.  I hope that you can also delight in our journey with us.

Enjoy your day!

Be Happy, Accept, Celebrate and have FUN!

We had our first consultation with Gerd, our Son-Rise Teacher, via Skype on Labour Day (one and half weeks ago).  It has help tremendously with all volunteers and myself in the Play Room.

Here's a clip of Tara happily playing with Remy.  He started off very attached to his fish, but by the 3rd part of the session, Remy totally joined in with an activity Tara made up using his motivation:  the fish.  She called it "Sort and Mix-up" - absolutely fabulous!

So great to see all our beloved volunteers again this past week.



Enjoy and cease your day!